Where things will go your way...or they won't

Thursday, November 8, 2007

I'm Bad and I'm Worldwide*

I recently added sitemeter to my page(I know, I'm a noob). Now I can stalk my readers, and thanks to google there are actually more than three people who read(ok, look at anyway) my blog and I have had some visits as far away as Argentina, Spain, Indonesia, and of course Canadia. How fucking awesome is that? I welcome immigrants legal and otherwise.

Day four of interminable closing of 7eo. Things are not good folks. I went to a local watering hole last night that I used to frequent but no longer do because it scores extremly high on the Douchey scale.(Someone should actually come up with a douchey scale to rate bars, it could be like Wikipedia or something...Hmmmm) Lets call this place uh... Port o' Call, since thats its name. It basically sucked, except some crazy motherfucker bought the bar drinks, no shit. Being the WPE I took full advantage and ordered a double. But still mostly it sucked, which it shouldn't seeing as how its motto is "Because everywhere else just sucks." Even there motto is douchey, and why does a bar need a motto?

As long as I'm rambling on I went to this bar with someone who is moving. You might remember that my bff, BBA just moved recently and I am having some abandonment issues. In order to avoid this problem I am issuing a decree.( I know this is like four posts but its my world and my pony so fuck off.)

NEW RULE-- Directed by WPE.
fade in:
Chancelot on a balcony.

"Henceforth and always no one shall be allowed to move ever! That is, move from Salt Lake, feel free to return to SLC if you formerly resided here, but remember this decree will be effective immediately upon your return. Also, this only applies to people I know. The rest a yous can do whatever the fuck you want. Thank you and good night. I almost forgot, everyone gets a pony. Peace out, bitches!"

Chancelot retires from balcony to the cheering slobbering sound of a crowd madly passionate about ponies.

*What song and band am I paraphrasing? Homework is awesome.


P said...

my new pony broke down and now I cant go anywhere. You couldn't decree us all new computers? W p e

chancelot said...

No attempt to answer the homework question you are failing! Ponies are fun and everybody wants one.

Valerie said...

I played your game at greenstreet the day BEFORE they shut it down?

what is up ronin.

i tagged.

Anonymous said...

As an attorney representin' one Ben Folds, I request that you cease and desist any and all references to copyrighted music.

Capitalistic principles are on the line here after all.

chancelot said...

Val- Yes, how did i miss you guys?

Anon- Wrong to new school. p.s. I know who you are why don't you have a blog?